In my always increasing desire to improve upon my efficiency I am looking to use the service from “That Can Be My Next Tweet“. The service analyzes your past tweets and predicts what you would be tweeting in the future. The first few examples I found were mildly interesting and then I found this:
And that just seemed so…perfect…so I kept pressing the button and found these other gems:
“I wanted. Thinking polka-dots. For the record, i have wine. meh, nothing lasts forever. yes.”
“Wait…@sqlvariant is that handy online as well. thanks! Why are hippies?”
“Actually, I won’t let him down. I saw ‘tongs’ as well, leave town. I can be back to fighting the past 30!”
“And there are the border guards. My ride this morning. Oh well. Whoa…”
And the one that probably sums up everything:
Many thanks to The Bloggess for her earlier post for informing me about how much time I can save during the day by simply generating tweets and then scheduling them in advance.
Hahah some of these are epic. My favorite sources for crazaaay tweets are @wise_kaplan and @crankykaplan, @justinrosslee and @kanyewest (obvi).
Top 10 uses for Twitter:
10) Keep that parole officer informed out your whereabouts.
9) Neighborhood dealer can shout out when that good Peruvian flake lands.
8) “Hey, Jim Jones from Guyana says we MUST drink the grape Kool-Aid RIGHT NOW … ! ”
7) Puppy mills and Michael Vick be maintainin’ 1 bad ass degree of separation.
6) Fish for feedback on pulling the plug for that loved one on life support.
5) Flash mob can congregate and maim a random IRS auditor.
4) Proudly tweet your recent colonoscopy to your special friends.
3) Have an “Off the hook!” moment with Charles Manson’s ‘My Murder Memoir’ feed.
2) 140 characters bets you never miss a local Ku Klux Klan rally again.
1) Finally realizing the government loves social networking, as it makes their dream job of spying / subpoenaing /
subjugating you SO much easier … PRICELESS.
Now, go read up on Carnivore and Echelon.