PASS 2010 Summit Review

With the PASS 2010 Summit experience in my rear view mirror I thought it would be best to do a quick review of just about everything that it had to offer. As I was going through my receipts and trying to fill out my expense reports it struck me as to how similar it was to the movie “The Hangover” as I pieced together events from the entire week. Well, similar expect no one got married (that I know of), or kidnapped a tiger, or lost a tooth.

So why not do a quick summary using quotes from the movie? I thought you’d never ask! Let’s get started.

Would you please put some pants on? I feel weird having to ask you twice.

For the first time at a PASS Summit, I had a roommate. Tim Ford (blog | @sqlagentman) needed a place to crash for the week and we had already roomed for the previous MVP Summit so I figured it would work out fine for the week. Of course he was only in the room for five minutes before he started throwing pr0n around the room. And then there was the night he came home with a tiara and a corncob something after apparently “winning” a contest. Strange doesn’t begin to describe the week. And when he started wearing a skirt kilt around the room (and NOT on kilt Wednesday) it started to make me think what life might be like in prison if kilts were allowed along with room service and a mini bar.

You’re not really wearing that are you? Wearing what? The man purse, you actually gonna wear that?

Lots of people wore kilts on Wednesday. And lots more people asked me why I wasn’t wearing one. The truth is I don’t tend to do things simply because everyone else is doing it. In fact, that is probably a good reason why I wouldn’t be doing something. But now that Bill Graziano (blog | @billgraziano) said he would take the stage next year in a kilt I fear that my time has come as well. If I do wear a kilt next year you can bet I will make an effort to find something very unique.

Remember, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Except for herpes. That shit’ll come back with you.

This quote serves two purposes. First, I was sick during the week and probably infected about a thousand other people directly. I did my best to fight it off by taking an overdose of vitamin C and zinc each day and somehow managed to make it through the week without being too run down. Then again, it could have been the eggnog lattes I enjoyed having with Buck Woody (blog | @buckwoody) each day (as Buck would say, “it’s like liquid sex except it lasts longer and is cheaper”)

The other reason this quote works so well has to do with the Underground Seattle tour I took part in on Sunday night. Apparently Seattle was founded by loggers, gold diggers, and whores. Who knew? As a student I always enjoyed history (probably the storytelling) and I was one or two classes short of having history as a minor in college simply because I enjoyed taking the classes. I remember one class on urban design and found a quick tour of the history of Seattle to be fascinating. And the stories about medicine men, various scam artists, syphilis, and “the pains” only added to the fun.

Your language is offensive.

Denny Cherry (blog | @mrdenny). Do I really need to say more here?

Listen to me, I’m gonna’ tell you something. I know some sick people in my life, this guy is the craziest, wildest bastard I ever met in my life!

This quote is perfect for Rob Farley (blog | @rob_farley). Rob and I met virtually this past year and finally in meatspace at SeaTac. When I arrived in Seattle I caught up with Brent Ozar who happened to arrive at the same time. When I caught up to Brent at baggage claim he was with a group of blokes that included Rob. Brent and I were going to take the light rail and managed to do so after about 45 minutes of talking to Rob If you have met Rob you would understand why it took 45 minutes. First, he can’t stop talking. Second, his accent is mesmerizing. It’s a gentle blend of British and Australian which I will now call Britalian.

Anyway, it turns out that my seat at the bloggers table was right next to Rob. For anyone that sits at the bloggers table you know how difficult it is to listen and type at the same time. You need to have your ears focused on the words coming from stage and you also need to be able to get words out of your head and down to your fingers. Now, imagine doing that while someone that speaks Britalian is sitting next to you and keeps asking you questions about something that was just said on stage. I would stop, try to figure out what in the hell Rob just said, ask him to repeat himself, try to respond to his question, and then try to get caught back up on the talk and blogging. This went on for three days.

And I wouldn’t miss that experience for anything. Next year I am going to switch seats to make sure I am next to Rob again. In fact, I might suggest that PASS builds a special box for the two of us to sit in and report on everything, kinda like a Statler and Waldorf thing. We could tweet using a #PASSmuppets hashtag and people could choose to follow along for the keynotes.

I’m getting a soda. You guys want anything?

Some of the best training you get at PASS happens outside of actual sessions. Such is my meeting with Rob Collie (blog | @PowerPivotPro). Rob and I met at TechEd last June and have stayed in contact since. He made it to PASS this year and we happened to be in the same session. We decided to get up and go have a drink soda together. After that session was done it was a refreshment break anyway so we just stayed in our seats. People would drift by and chat with us as well. It was very social and also very informative. I learned more about PowerPivot and BI from Rob in that hour or so than I think I would have learned from any session. The reason is very simple: I could ask very pointed questions about what it is I wanted to know.

See, during a session you need to let the presenter talk. It isn’t time for Q&A, which comes at the very end for a few minutes and then that speaker needs to move along. But at PASS you can sit down with someone and just talk. And if you talk with someone like Rob you get a chance to learn a lot about something you may not otherwise. It’s one of the biggest advantages of going to the PASS Summit: the training and networking you can get done in the hallway while having a soda.

And because quoting the song would not have been enough, I will leave you with this video trailer for the movie itself, enjoy!