This amazed me. I mean, besides the five pounds part because I can understand how easy it is to eat several pounds of bacon before you even realize what you have done. And note that the five pounds is probably the pre-cooked weight, so the actual weight consumed is less, but still it is an amazing accomplishment.
What really amazed me is that he never smelled the bacon-loving goodness in the air the next morning. How could she prepare five pounds of bacon without him knowing? The smell of bacon cooking would certainly wake me from my sleep. And I would suspect that anyone else that has five pounds of bacon laying around would be the same way. And who the hell has five pounds of bacon laying around?
So, was it already cooked, and she just warmed it up quickly? That might minimize the smell somewhat and perhaps she used some Lysol spray. I don’t know. Seems weird. And then there is the fact that I can picture her sitting there, with a huge pile of bacon on a single plate, raw, staring into space and just eating.
Awesome.
so do you know John Scalzi? SciFi author and renowned Baconologist.
whatever.scalzi.com/about/the-canonical-bacon-page/
well, not personally, no. but i am familiar with some of his works and will have to find out more about him. and the picture of bacon taped to his cat is nicely done, wish i would have thought of that.
Wow, and Grand Rapids – that’s near me. I must find this bacon-eating woman.
5 lbs. of bacon? I’m impressed. Okay, this is up there with my thrilling 3 story. I used to work at a place that had thrilling 3’s, fantastic 4’s, fabulous 5’s. That’s 3 eggs, 3 toast, 3 bacon, 3 sausage, 3 pancakes, hash browns. I guy came in (at 4:30 a.m.), ordered a thrilling 3. Ate it. Then ordered another. Waitress chuckled. He got mad. She apologized. Put the order in. Yes, he ate that second T3 too! I’m amazed even to this day.
Midnight Bacon? Is that what the kids are calling it these days?