So this past weekend I got myself an xbox 360 so that I could hook into my Netflix to watch movies instantly. At the same time I decided to ditch my TiVo as well as my old DVD player. So, a consolidation of sorts in terms of hardware, remotes, and monthly budget. While poking around on the xbox I found that I could watch some television shows as well which I thought was great because I just got rid of the TiVo and figured I would watch shows through iTunes when and if necessary.
So, I go to download a television show and see that I need to buy the episode, which is fine because I am willing to pay a dollar or two for the episode and I find that I need to pay with Microsoft points.
Say what?
So, it is not enough the Microsoft wants to dominate the world by controlling our systems, they also want to control our currency? I mean, why do I need these points? Why is cash or credit not good enough? Why not hook into PayPal? And what do I do if I am in Europe? Is there a conversion of Microsoft points into Euros? If so, can I buy them on the open market in one currency and redeem them in another? Does Microsoft also have a tax department that I need to file a return with after I make a profit dealing in the points-to-euros-to-dollars market?
Then I realized that I could probably save up enough to purchase one of those SQL MVP awards because I am pretty sure that is how you get one but no one can tell me what it costs. Or maybe it is that you can trade in your MVP award for a bunch of points. I am fairly certain that points are tied to the MVP program somehow but none of my MVP friends will confirm nor deny which makes sense since they are part of the cabal. I imagine conversations in their meetings go something like this:
“SQLBatman isn’t an MVP? How can that be?”
“He didn’t have an xbox or any Microsoft Points.”
“Can he be turned?”
“I suppose, but he blogs about whale bacon, and doesn’t seem like he is worth the effort to nominate.”
“Well, we could use the diversion when we go forward with the GlobalCurrency V2.1 rollout next year.”
I am this close to beating the Kung-Fu Panda game so soon I will have enough Microsoft Points and will be able to prove I have as much MVP-ness as anyone else.
Campaigning for MVP are you? Tsk Tsk. Everyone knows you must locate the 5 magic glass skulls hidden around the globe. That is the only way.
Not campaigning unless of course I could trade it in for some Microsoft points but no one will tell me how many it is worth.
If the five skulls are the only way, did all of the thousands of MVPs locate them already? If so, what do they do? Find the skull, take a picture with the skull, then put it back for the next candidate to find? If the skulls are magic, could I find one and wish for the other four to appear so that would cut down on my travel expenses?
I’ve heard finding the skulls is like geocaching. They tell you exactly where to go within 15 feet or so. BUT, then you have trudge out into the woods and walk in circles in poison ivy for twenty minutes before you locate the skull (usually under poison ivy). Since, for most people with anything even approach a normal number of chromosomes, this is too insane a task, thereby they weed out those without the full lading of MVP-ness. That’s how I heard it anyway.
No mention of points.
At the next PASS Summit, we should have a “Not-an-MVP Party” at the same date/time they have the MVP Party. And before you’re allowed in the door, we frisk you for Zunes.
Frisk = Mug?
Tim, stop giving all the secrets away! Besides, that was last year. Didn’t you get the memo?
😉