Comments on: The Broken American DBA http://thomaslarock.com/2009/02/the-broken-american-dba/ Wed, 08 Feb 2012 16:15:00 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: SQLBatman http://thomaslarock.com/2009/02/the-broken-american-dba/comment-page-1/#comment-313 SQLBatman Wed, 18 Feb 2009 00:29:04 +0000 http://sqlbatman.com/?p=773#comment-313 cherie, Yes, it absolutely is true for women as well. in the book Rabbi Shmuley talks about the problems women face as they an innundated with images of Hollywood models all day long (TV, magazine covers, etc.) For guys, it is mostly about the perception of being a success. Rabbi Shmuley tries to point out how ordinary people are heroes to their children, and he does get his message across. When you read about guys who made ten million dollars last year and they are depressed because they didn't make more it really hits home. And it is not about greed, it is about your being perceived as a success or a failure by your peers. It is a fascinating look into our society and, in my opinion, it is not unique to the USA, nor to one gender. It is a human quality, one that needs to be kept in check. cherie,

Yes, it absolutely is true for women as well. in the book Rabbi Shmuley talks about the problems women face as they an innundated with images of Hollywood models all day long (TV, magazine covers, etc.) For guys, it is mostly about the perception of being a success. Rabbi Shmuley tries to point out how ordinary people are heroes to their children, and he does get his message across.

When you read about guys who made ten million dollars last year and they are depressed because they didn’t make more it really hits home. And it is not about greed, it is about your being perceived as a success or a failure by your peers.

It is a fascinating look into our society and, in my opinion, it is not unique to the USA, nor to one gender. It is a human quality, one that needs to be kept in check.

]]> By: Mary Lee http://thomaslarock.com/2009/02/the-broken-american-dba/comment-page-1/#comment-312 Mary Lee Tue, 17 Feb 2009 20:57:55 +0000 http://sqlbatman.com/?p=773#comment-312 Well said! Thanks! Well said! Thanks!

]]> By: cherie sheriff http://thomaslarock.com/2009/02/the-broken-american-dba/comment-page-1/#comment-311 cherie sheriff Tue, 17 Feb 2009 20:05:22 +0000 http://sqlbatman.com/?p=773#comment-311 This is true for women too. I actually had to give up the most exciting part of my career for my children's sake for many years. It does make a huge difference on both sides. In that gap, I felt I was often far behind what I should be, but I had to be there for my family. Now that my children are teenagers almost off in college, I am back in my chosen path of specialization and excellence, but still only to the extent that they are ready to give me up. It was extraordinarily hard for me, but it has paid off in quality of life. Telecomuting options also help out. Being able to go home, fix dinner and spend time with the family, then get back to whatever I am working on after they go off to bed helps me keep a little ahead of the game. The only difference is, my children (plus some usually) and my dogs meet me before I ever get in the door. I wish they would at least let me in my own house before attacking me. ;) This is true for women too. I actually had to give up the most exciting part of my career for my children’s sake for many years. It does make a huge difference on both sides. In that gap, I felt I was often far behind what I should be, but I had to be there for my family. Now that my children are teenagers almost off in college, I am back in my chosen path of specialization and excellence, but still only to the extent that they are ready to give me up. It was extraordinarily hard for me, but it has paid off in quality of life. Telecomuting options also help out. Being able to go home, fix dinner and spend time with the family, then get back to whatever I am working on after they go off to bed helps me keep a little ahead of the game.

The only difference is, my children (plus some usually) and my dogs meet me before I ever get in the door. I wish they would at least let me in my own house before attacking me. ;)

]]> By: Tim Mitchell http://thomaslarock.com/2009/02/the-broken-american-dba/comment-page-1/#comment-310 Tim Mitchell Tue, 17 Feb 2009 19:52:08 +0000 http://sqlbatman.com/?p=773#comment-310 Well written - I've had the same discussion with myself. I'm sure I could be better at a lot of things, perhaps even among the top in my field, but there could come a point when career eventually overshadows everything else and other "distractions" including family, health, and me-time are just blips in the rear view mirror. It's important to constantly improve oneself, but setting goals that are consistent with one's situation - including aptitude, family situation, and mental state - are just as important. Well written – I’ve had the same discussion with myself. I’m sure I could be better at a lot of things, perhaps even among the top in my field, but there could come a point when career eventually overshadows everything else and other “distractions” including family, health, and me-time are just blips in the rear view mirror. It’s important to constantly improve oneself, but setting goals that are consistent with one’s situation – including aptitude, family situation, and mental state – are just as important.

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